Shalom Lamm on Becoming the Leader You’re Still Learning to Be

Shalom Lamm

Leading a team when you don’t feel like a leader can be one of the most uncomfortable and transformational experiences in entrepreneurship. For Shalom Lamm, a seasoned entrepreneur with decades of operational and leadership experience, that feeling isn’t just familiar—it’s foundational.

“The first time I led a team, I didn’t feel qualified. I had vision, yes. But the idea that I was supposed to lead people? That felt like a stretch,” Lamm recalls.

If you’re a new founder, manager, or project lead wrestling with imposter syndrome, you’re not alone—and you’re not disqualified. According to Shalom Lamm, feeling unsure doesn’t mean you’re failing as a leader; it means you’re human. And growth, especially in leadership, starts with discomfort.

Here’s what Shalom Lamm has learned about leading teams when you’re still figuring out your own leadership identity—and how you can grow into the role without faking it.

You Don’t Have to Know Everything—But You Do Have to Listen

When Shalom first stepped into leadership, he assumed he had to have all the answers. The pressure to appear confident and decisive weighed heavily.

“I thought leaders needed to speak first, move fast, and always be sure,” he says. “In reality, the best leaders I’ve worked with ask better questions—and listen twice as much as they speak.”

According to Lamm, confidence in leadership isn’t about pretending to be the smartest person in the room. It’s about creating space for your team to contribute, challenge, and collaborate. Leadership begins with trust, not certainty.

Clarity Over Charisma

Especially for first-time leaders, it’s easy to believe that being a “natural leader” means being charismatic, outgoing, and inspirational. But Shalom Lamm emphasizes a different trait: clarity.

“Charisma might get attention. But clarity gets results,” he says. “If your team knows where you’re going, how you’ll get there, and what success looks like—everything else is secondary.”

New leaders often make the mistake of overcompensating with motivational talk or overexplaining. Shalom recommends instead setting clear expectations, defining measurable goals, and being transparent about what’s working and what’s not.

You Set the Tone—Even When You’re Still Learning

Shalom Lamm believes that even when you’re uncertain, how you show up matters. People don’t need perfection—they need consistency.

“Early in my leadership journey, I realized I couldn’t control whether I always felt confident. But I could control whether I showed up with integrity, followed through on my word, and treated people with respect.”

Whether you’re managing one intern or a team of 50, your team takes cues from you. If you’re panicked, they’ll feel it. If you’re grounded—even when admitting you don’t have all the answers—they’ll trust you more, not less.

Feedback Is a Leadership Superpower

One of the fastest ways to grow into your leadership role, according to Lamm, is to ask your team what you can do better.

“It’s humbling to ask for feedback, but it’s also the most efficient leadership development tool I’ve ever used.”

Shalom regularly holds feedback sessions, both formal and informal, and creates a culture where critique isn’t a threat—it’s an asset. By modeling openness, he encourages his team to grow alongside him.

Imposter Syndrome Is Part of the Process

If you’re leading a team and wondering when you’ll finally feel like a real leader, Shalom Lamm has a reassuring message: that feeling may never fully go away—and that’s okay.

“Every time I stepped into a new level of leadership—whether launching a new company or hiring my first executive—I felt like I wasn’t ready. But that stretch zone is where the transformation happens.”

What matters, says Lamm, is that you keep showing up, keep learning, and keep leading anyway. Confidence will catch up to action—not the other way around.

Final Thoughts: You’re More of a Leader Than You Think

Leadership isn’t granted by a title or validated by a viral post. It’s built moment by moment, conversation by conversation. As Shalom Lamm puts it:

“Leadership isn’t about always feeling ready. It’s about being willing to grow—especially when you don’t.”

If you’re leading a team and questioning yourself, take heart: You’re not alone. And more importantly, you’re already leading—because you care enough to want to do it well.